Friday, December 31, 2010

The rollercoaster that was... 2010

December 31, 2010
6pm

What a rollercoaster year this has been for the Japster… A crazy 12 months indeed. And as I write this now, nostalgia caresses me like a comfortable and gentle blanket from my youth… I was here doing the same thing almost exactly 1 year ago… Examining and re-examining the year that had passed. Analyzing what had happened and extrapolating the what-could-haves...

But no lost tears are to be shed for 2010. It was an awesome year for me in every sense. I found new job. I found a bunch of new friends. I found a lover. I continued to find myself.

So many things have happened to me this year. And while I sit here feeling a tad bittersweet about it all (Hahaha… I’ll tell you about it later, promise!), I can’t help but feel blessed about the last 12 months. Thank you God for your awesomeness! Unlike the year that was 2009, 2010 was alive and vibrant for me. Full of joyous laughter, rambunctious fun, unforgettable debauchery, exciting new experiences, and gripping tears… Last year, I felt a little cheated by life. Like I hadn’t taken full advantage of what the world had to offer. This year was different! This year, I lived. And even though I encountered some pain along the way, it’s ok. Once can’t truly appreciate the sweet if they haven’t tasted the bitter. I wouldn’t have had it any other way.









Saturday, December 25, 2010

Merry Christmas to the Idealists, the Optimists and the Romantics


December 25, 2010
3:49pm
My room in Multi while listening to the Glee Season 2 soundtrack…

It’s great to be home… Home for Christmas! I wouldn’t have it any other way…

As a kid, my family used to have these elaborate Christmas Eve family gatherings. Family member upon family member would slowly trickle into my Grandparents house or our house on the night of December 24th and it would seem like the whole world was in the house! It was chaotic and festive and full of life… The food would be overflowing. The chatter and laughter and Christmas carols unknowingly layered over each other exhausted all spaced. Everyone was there, and everything was perfect. I don’t know… I guess when you’re a kid, these types of family gatherings seem enormous in scale. Everything’s huge when your 2 feet tall. But really, those were the days when your family was your world, the world was supremely good, and the stars were reachable dreams to be attained when you grew up just a little more.

So yes, I guess the pure childhood joys of Christmas has helped fuel the idealism I so lovingly cling to now as an adult. To large extents I still believe that family is the world, and that the world is ultimately good, and that you can reach your dreams if you try really really hard and have just enough luck. Idealism is rare in this cynical world of ours, but to my fellow optimists and romantics – come rejoice with me. For Christmas is OUR time of the year! When hope and love and wide-eyed childhood dreams reign. May we never lose this feeling, this yearning for life, this real belief that our dreams our not long winded pipe-dream fantasies but possibilities – No matter what challenges try to jade you…

Keep dancing like nobody’s watch and loving like you’re not going to hurt. Coz living wouldn’t be living if you didn’t aim for the stars and give it your all.

Merry Christmas to all… especially those who never give up on the silver lining...








Thursday, June 17, 2010

And so it's done...

Still at work, churning out a few emails.
Its 12:18am.
I tell my bosses tomorrow. And I'm nervous as hell.



June 17, 2010




TNS Singapore
ALM International Research Center
50 Scotts Road #02-01
Singapore 228242




RE: Resignation Letter




To Whom It May Concern:


I regret to inform you that I am resigning from my position as Research Manager for TNS Singapore. I will need to negotiate with HR and my team regarding my last day of employment.


After serious consideration, I have decided to take on a new professional challenge. With that said, I have gone through enriching experiences, gained valuable skills, and worked with wonderful people at TNS. I will miss my job and colleagues at TNS very much.


Thank you so much for the support and the opportunities that you have provided me during the last two years at TNS and previously at legacy RI. I have enjoyed my tenure with the company.


I wish you and the company all the best. I am sure that our paths cross again in the future.




Best,




Jacques Philippe Izon Reyes






[CC: David Jeffs, Amit Dogra, Patricia Lie]

Sunday, February 14, 2010

We did our best, but there are times when best is no damn good

It’s Valentine’s day… and I’m in the office. Hehehe. It’s ok. Don’t be sad. I have a dinner date tonight, so it’s not so bad.

Anyways, our Nokia client is flying in next week for a two day workshop, and I’m just prepping a few things… you know, dotting my i's and crossing my t’s, installing all the bells and whistles. I’ve been at it for about 2-3 hours… and I have to admit, I’m pretty distracted. Let me tell you why…

You see, raises and promotions were announced two days ago and…

I actually did ok. Not great, but not bad. I’m not happy, but I’m not sad (stupid rhyming, sorry). I got promoted in July ‘09 with my increase promised in January ‘10 (there was an 8 month company-wide freeze on hiring and pay increase. Stupid recession). So this week, when all the bosses across all 3 offices were the roaming the Singapore office, we knew something big was gonna go down! Then at about 3pm, letters and emails started to arrive. One by one everyone heard something one way or another. It’s like in those WWII movies when a soldier hands a letter to a mother and father; the mother opens the envelop and within 30 seconds is on the floor sobbing… OK, well maybe not that dramatic, but it was freaking nerve-wreaking nonetheless.

In a matter of 45 minutes, the company finally announced all pay increases along with this round of promotions. The good news is, when you compare my salary percentage increase to other in the office, I pretty much come out on top. My increase “is well above average across the company and reflects your continued growth and future potential - well done mate!” so emails my boss. A bunch of us were comparing increases, and I have yet to hear someone who beat my 20% increase. Hellz ya biatches!

To add another mini cake on top of my own cake :), my direct report – Dorcas (That's her in the sari) – was also promoted this January round!!! How awesome is that! Even though she only has 1 year and 5 months of experience (promotions are usually given after 2 years for her level), she’s a monster of an exec, and I am so proud of her… and between you and me, I’m pretty fucking proud of me too! I don’t mean to boast (I will anyways), but I’m a pretty kick ass manager! I’m pretty sure I had a strong influence in Dorcas’ rocket-fast growth and eventually her promotion as well. I’m pretty sure she knows this too. Man, I love that girl. I’m like a proud big brother!



OK. So here’s the sad part…

There’s this other guy on my team named JH Teo… a 24 year old Chinese kid with (now) brown hair and a face that kind of reminds me of those troll dolls from my youth – but cuter and more human-like. He a little arrogant, but he works his ass off. He can hold his own and he takes well to responsibility and challenges. I’ve been training and mentoring him for the past year and I’ve watched him grow from a seemingly pubescent drooling Chinese boy who didn’t know his ass from his head (his words not mine) to a sharp, confident, competent project manager with his own informal management line responsibilities. It’s been an amazing transformation. The shitty part is it all been majorly overlooked.

JH makes crap (like seriously, crap – less than half what I was making before I got my raise!), but he was up for promotion this round. So we were all hoping that it would all balance out and end up for the better. We were all fighting so hard for him – seriously like 6 people with positions ranging from manager to department director. Apparently, all that didn’t make a difference because he did not get his promotion nor did he get any sort of pay increase. It’s ridiculous; almost disgusting. He deserves it so much, that nothing short of writing it in the sky with in green smoke – wicked witch style – would do him justice.

Alas, justice kept her blindfolds on for JH, and he gave his resignation on the spot. Can you blame him? When, I found out I told him to leave and never to come back. Even with all the good news, my chest’s filled with heaviness and my head’s hung low. I admit, I dropped a tear or two. We all did the best we could, but there times when best is no damn good. As his mentor and advocate in the office, I have failed. And it sucks. And there’s nothing I can do about it.

JH, man. I know you know this already, my I want to write it down so that it’s legit and real. You have been an incredible teammate and it has been my pleasure to have worked and mentored you over the past year. You are a brother to me and I have your back! I wish you the best bro!

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Just haven't met him yet

January 16 at 11:43am on a Lazy saturday afternoon

I woke up and had breakfast to this. It made me smile... Just because...

I Might Have To Wait
I'll Never Give Up
I Guess It's Half Timing
And The Other Half's Luck
Wherever You Are
Whenever It's Right
You Come Out Of Nowhere And Into My Life



Thursday, December 31, 2009

Kisses at the stroke of midnight

7:35 pm – New Years Eve 2009
My room in manila listening to Keyisha Cole’s A Different Me album

So it’s new years eve… Sigh and I’m home with Family. My younger brothers woke up late and aren’t hungry, Ate and Raff went to have dinner with the Roxas-Chuas, Kuya Geeps and Paul aren’t coming until later, and Mom and I decided not have dinner and just wait for Media Noche… I’ve gained so much unwanted weight already in the last week, so it’s not such a bad thing to skip dinner. Plus, the anticipation for Mom’s scrumptiously authentic Japanese Shabu Shabu and Yakiniku are well worth the wait…

As I wait for another 2-3ish hours more till we chow down on yummy yakiniku goodness, I thought I’d try to sneak another blog in before the new year!

I was going though facebook statuses and updates, and I stumbled on multiple posts about 3-2-1ings at midnight and having that significant other to sweetly kiss as the clock struck midnight. “Awww… How romantic,” I thought to myself. Then felt kind of sad…

I’ve been single for way too long! I get lonely sometimes, and I really want to share my thoughts, my stupid jokes, my crazy energy, my secrets, my fears, and my dreams (amongst other things) with someone special, and have him share his craziness with me too. I want to have those little stupid moments where I just can’t stop smiling. I want to wake up beside someone and wish that time would stop… You know… All that Romeo and Juliet, cheesy movie crap. I love that crap, and I’ve been without it for much much more than I’d like.

So, now I’m going to add to the list of 8 resolutions I have 2 blogs down… I will seriously keep myself open to being in a relationship with someone – so one great and handsome and smart… someone I would be proud to introduce to my family (that’ really the ultimate test!) 2010, come on man. I’m a good guy, so give a brother a break! I know you’ll kick 2009’s ass when it comes to the boy department… actually you’ll kick 2009’s ass in most departments (if not all departments really! Hehe!)

Alright then. Here we come - bells, whistles, dark demin, dunks, straw fedora and all! 2010 and Jappy/Jacques (schizo much!?!?) will be an unbeatable team! So come on over and hitch a ride or get out of the way, coz its gonna be so awesome you won’t know what hitcha!





From the Glee Volume 1 Soundtrack
Got no feel,
I got no rhythm

I just keep losing my beat

I'm ok, I'm alright

Ain't gonna face no defeat

I just gotta get out of this prison cell

Someday I'm gonna be free, Lord!

Find me somebody to love
Can anybody find me somebody to love?

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

A kid again... A kid always...

Mom’s bedroom floor at home
12:27am December 29, 2009


I’m sitting on the floor of my mom’s enormous room (She renovated the house in 2003 and seriously, I’ve had whole apartments half the size of this room) while Ate surfs the net from mom’s bed and Mom wraps gifts on the floor 2 meters away. Man, I feel like a kid again! More so now than usual. Maybe is the magic of the holidays. Maybe it’s being home-home, and not in the foreign addresses I call home when I’m abroad. I love being a kid again :)

People I meet now call me Jacques. But the people I grew up with call me Jappy/Japs/Japster. Hahaha… I love that name! JAPPY!!!! I think it’s fitting coz it’s so happy! I’m that adolescently awkward, annoyingly overactive, dark skinned, buck toothed little scoundrel of my youth. Underneath this 20 something year old exterior is the still the heart of a pubescent high school grasping at the straws of youthful virility to battle the everyday angst and chaos of adulthood.

I was staring at myself this morning (as I do pretty much every morning since I started to work out a few months ago… Hahaha, dotcha love ‘em “just got out of bed” abs), and I was thinking in my head… who the hell is that adult man staring at me? As I look a little closer, I figure it out… It’s like that scene from the movie, Hook, where that little white kid tugs and pulls on Robin Williams’ face and say, “There you are Peter!” Somewhere behind those deep-set eyes and disheveled hair is that insecure brace-face kid in the oversized Gap t-shirts and 1-size too big polo sneakers (coz the grown-ups always buy kids clothes that are bigger than what is normal so we can grow into them…).

Yup, sometimes I can be a big kid… Innocent and naïve. Idealistic and bright-eyed. Energetic and larger than life. Free-spirited, carefree and adventurous. And I love that. I miss that. But alas, the age of innocence apparently has an expiration date and all will inevitably take a bite from that apple. And that’s where I am now – a kid who looks like an adult, pretending to be an adult, living in an adult world… But beneath these (slightly uneven) doe eyes is a simple boy smiling for no apparent reason. Easily forgetting the painful, and dwelling in an unexplainable feeling of juvenile contentment. Happy just to be…




Photos ripped from my man, Mr. Daniel Gimenez - www. danielgimenez.com

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

A new dawn. A new day. A new year.

December 22, 2009 - 12:43am
Sitting Indian style on my bed, in my room, in my lavender apartment
Listening to “Kahit Ika’y Isang Panaginip Lang”


Here we are again, and words are hard to find… Another year goes by, and I don’t know exactly what I have to show for it. Sigh. I got promoted to manager. I went to Hong Kong. I partied decently hard. I dated around. That pretty much sums up my year in 4 meager little sentences. It’s pretty pathetic I know, but not totally unexpected (I don’t know… does that sound like a copout to you. Sure does, doesn’t it).

2009 was a tough year for most – just ask the US economy or Nokia! Recession, countless freak natural disasters mergers and management change, So You Think You Can Dance moving to fall instead of summer, George dying in Grey’s Anatomy – shit was going down everywhere. And while I can use all of that to rationalize the mundane 12 months that I’ve had, I know I am mostly to blame… I sit here on my bed and contemplate the to-ing and fro-ings of the past year, I can’t help but feel a little disappointed with myself.

It was a drag yourself out of bed and go to work year, and that’s not how to I like to live my life.

Granted I accomplished 5 out of the 8 resolutions I carved in blog-stone last year… But to tell you the truth, those resolutions weren’t the most vivacious or grandiose. So maybe that’s where it all stemmed from… Let’s take a quick review shall we…


New Year’s Resolutions for 2009

- I will quit smoking – Basically done
- I will work less, but work better/faster/smarter – FAIL
- I will make more friends in Singapore – OK, not bad. But I think I need to make more “friend” friends and less “acquaintance” friends
- I will make an effort to explore Singapore – Done son!
- I will ride the Singapore Flyer! – Twice.
- I will start writing, if not finish writing, my book – MAJOR FAIL
- I will keep in contact with friends that aren’t located in the country I currently reside in – EPIC FAIL
- I will go to the gym, start taking protein supplements and look like a stud – Fodamsho. Have you seen my triceps lately?


So basically, here’s my resolution to the flaccidity of 2009 (hahaha. I like puns). I set better resolutions for next year! Fool proof right?!?! YES! That old “shoot for the moon…” aphorism comes to mind. So, with some regurgitated unaccomplished well liked resolutions from 2009, here goes.


New Year’s Resolutions for 2010


- I will work less, but work better/faster/smarter OR get a new fucking job
- I will make closer friends in Singapore
- I will keep in contact with family and friends that aren’t located in the country I currently reside in
- Deliberately seek/cause debauchery (the awesome, sexy, cool kind of course!)
- I will travel a lot more to seek/cause said debauchery. How about at least 3-4 trips that are NOT to manila
- Use my digicam to capture said debauchery
- Keep working out, and that stomach flab into muscle ab.
- Oh and I gotta blog more. Shit.


Again, 8 resolutions. Let’s see how I fair… I’m gonna print this shit out and stick it on my wall. No joke. Better watch out 2010… I’m coming for you, biatch! Bring it! Imma kick cho ass so hard, my toes’ll tickle your tonsils! ;p

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

"Suit Up!" Office-Jacques (batteries sold separately)

OK. so I took this quick 5 minute test provided by my company that is supposed to give mea short perspective about my current professional persona - how I act and feel in the office, what motivates me professionally, my management style, etc. It was a short 2 question survey that had me identify a words from a long list of adjectives that described how I feel others in the company perseve me and how I really feel I am.


Anyways, I think the results were spot on!!!! Like 95 percent!!! It's pretty damn scary actually. I had my direct report read it and she said it was pretty fucking accurate. Well, have a read at the results and you tell me.





The results of the Predictive Index® survey should always be reviewed by a trained Predictive Index analyst. The PI Reporter® provides you with a brief overview of the results of the Predictive Index® and prompts you to consider many aspects of the results not contained in the overview. If you have not yet attended the Predictive Index® Management Workshop, please consult someone who has attended in order to complete the report.


STRONGEST BEHAVIORS
Jacques Reyes's PI Pattern is extremely wide, which means that his behaviors are very strongly expressed and his needs are very strongly felt.

Jacques Reyes will most strongly express the following behaviors:
- Intense proactivity and aggressiveness in driving to reach his goals. Actively and boldly challenges the world, his business, and even others' areas within his business.
- Strongly independent in putting forth his own ideas, which are innovative and original, and if implemented, will change the organization. Resourceful and forceful in overcoming obstacles, he vigorously and directly attacks problems; fights back hard when challenged.
- Incredibly strong sense of urgency; he's in nearly constant motion, putting pressure on himself and others for immediate results. Unable to do routine work.
- Connecting very quickly to others, he's strongly motivated to build and leverage relationships to get work done. Openly and easily shares information about himself.
- Strikingly expressive, effusive, and verbal in communicating; he talks a lot, and very quickly.
- Enthusiastically persuades and motivates others by adjusting his message and delivery to the current recipient.
- Very collaborative, he works almost exclusively with and through others. Strong intuitive understanding of team cohesion, dynamics, and interpersonal relations.


SUMMARY
Jacques Reyes is a confident, independent self-starter with competitive drive, initiative, a sense of urgency, and the ability to make decisions and take responsibility for them. He can react and adjust quickly to changing conditions and come up with ideas for dealing with them.

His drive is purposeful, directed at getting things done quickly. He responds positively and actively to challenge and pressure, and he has confidence in his ability to handle novel problems and people. He is an outgoing, poised person, a lively and enthusiastic communicator, tending to be a little more authoritative than persuasive in his style. Jacques Reyes talks briskly, with assurance and conviction and is a stimulating influence on others, while being firm, direct, and self-assured in dealing with them.

His work pace is distinctly faster-than-average. He learns and takes action quickly. On the other hand, he will become impatient and restless working repetitively with routine details or structured work, will delegate such work if his position permits, and will follow up, focusing on completion and accomplishment, rather than how things were done. With an interest in other people and their development, Jacques Reyes will delegate authority, limiting such delegation to people in whom he has high levels of confidence, and following up with pressure for timely results.

He makes decisions about people and situations quickly. He assesses what's generally going on, and rather than exhaustively research, pulls together the information he has and takes action forcefully. He's confident in his assumptions about any missing information, and is comfortable acting even in the absence of complete information. For Jacques Reyes, continual progress towards the general goal is more important than always being exactly on track; he's flexible and will make course corrections as necessary, when the time arises.

Sure of himself, Jacques Reyes sets high standards of achievement for himself and others and looks for opportunities to compete and to win. Venturesome, he is stimulated by new challenges and situations, and is generally driving himself and others to new horizons. He is ambitious both for himself and for the business which employs him.


MANAGEMENT STYLE
As a manager of people or projects, Jacques Reyes will be:
- Broadly focused; his attention is on where he's bringing his team, and what goals he wants them to achieve, rather than on the specifics of how they will get there
- Comfortable delegating details and implementation plans
- Reluctant to delegate true authority; he will discuss ideas with others, and is open to their view points, but will only change his mind when the idea better helps his overall goal
- Quick to follow-up on delegated tasks, generally asking more whether it's finished than how it was accomplished
- Constantly looking to improve performance and ability to compete
- Inclusive and team-building
- Direct and quick to voice his opinion of how things are going.


MANAGEMENT STRATEGIES
To maximize his effectiveness, productivity, and job satisfaction, consider providing Jacques Reyes with the following:
- As much independence and flexibility in his activities as possible
- Opportunities to learn and advance
- Opportunities for expression of, and action on, his own ideas and initiatives
- Variety and challenge in his responsibilities
- Opportunities to prove himself, and recognition and reward for doing so
- Freedom from routines and repetitive details, balanced by accountability for results.


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Sunday, September 20, 2009

Weddings and Butterflies

September 20, 2009
12:26am

I just got back from a colleague’s wedding – the second wedding I have attended in here in the Lion City – and I have to say… these Singaporean Chinese wedding do have their own unique traits to them and it takes a little getting using to. I mean ok, there’s some really cool things like the 10 course dinners with shark’s fin soup, steamed fish, roast duck and some kind of noodle. There’s also the giving of Ang Pao (did I spell that right) instead of having a registry list…

But there’s also some things that are… well, different. The emperor-like entrance of the first course complete with fog machine, laser light show, and Chinese opera music. There’s also the bride’s costume change from her traditional white wedding gown to a bold-colored formal evening dress (think burgundies, crimsons, chameleon plums). Or the fact that there is no band or dancing at the end of the event (I think this is what I miss the most ).

The thing with weddings is that it’s one of those days that will change your life forever. As I lay here in bed clicking away on my lappie, listening to cheese love songs, and exhausted from the day’s events – I can only imagine what fatigue the Bride and Groom (Dorothy and Mike) must be going through. Her feet dying from the 4 inch heels; his face sore from the excessive smiling; Both of them stepping into a whole new world – walking hand-in-hand, brimming with excitement and trepidation.

I imagine it’s just like graduation or quitting your job or moving countries… Years to get there, months of planning and in one day, it’s all over. The experience will wind down and the night will draw to a close. Then you wake up the next morning asking yourself if it really happened or if it was all just one of those very intricate dreams that you unexplainably remember quite well. As you smudge the sleep out of from your eyes, you look around and reality hits you… Shit, I actually did that! Hehe (nervous laughter).

Just the thought of it reawakens the digestive butterflies of years past. Your stomach is a little twisted, and your chest feels tighter than normal. You close your eyes and a part of you hopes that it actually never happened so you can cling to the comforts of past present. But then you open your eyes, throw off the sheets and get out of bed. Shit ain’t gonna happen if you hibernate all day. And you know deep down that the new day isn’t so bad. Sometimes, it’s actually really really fucking good! Sometimes.

So thank God for those butterflies; coz it’s those butterfly moments that lets you know you’re alive. And being alive makes life worth living.